WHO I AM
Hello, I’m Nancy Epstein
Your Compassionate DBT Skills Coach for Families in Turmoil
For loved ones of those struggling with emotional dysregulation
As a UC Berkeley public health graduate who spearheaded many arts enterprises, I've always been known as the go-getter, the creative force who turns challenges into solutions. But the real test of my mettle came not from the business world, but from a personal crucible — navigating the stormy waters of parenting my emotionally volatile daughter.
No amount of conventional parenting wisdom could brace us for the tidal wave of her emotional crises. Tough love backfired, traditional therapy barely scratched the surface, and medications fell short of our hopes. Our family was floundering in a sea of guilt, confusion, and isolation, grappling with a relentless question: "What are we missing?" The turning point came when my husband and I participated in a DBT-based Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): What It Is & Purpose (clevelandclinic.org) skills course. Once we started working on ourselves, we began to chart a course through the tempest. Understanding her mental health struggles and embracing a new paradigm shift transformed not only her life but our entire family dynamic.
Was it a quick fix? No. But it worked.
The journey was long, but it led us to a haven of empathy, mastery, and renewed hope. Inspired by the profound impact of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, I've dedicated years to teaching these life-altering skills to others as a Family Connections leader, trained by renowned experts Drs. Alan Fruzzetti and Perry Hoffman. Over eight years, I've witnessed more than a thousand individuals, and their families embark on their own paths from despair to a place of understanding, peace, and even joy.
Through Wise Mind Mentor, I extend my experience to you — offering DBT-skills coaching customized for you.
You're not alone. I understand because I've lived it. Welcome to a community where healing begins, and resilience thrives
Click here to find a better way forward with your loved one
MY STORY
My Challenge
The isolation, frustration, intense sadness and pain of trying to help my emotionally dysregulated child find stability and realize her full potential, brought me to my knees. Not to mention all the striving just to keep her safe and alive at times.
For years my daughter saw me as her enemy. I was the scapegoat for her frustrations and unhappiness. I tried so hard to create what I thought was a loving, stable family life, providing her with all the support and structure I believed would help her become her best self.
It wasn’t enough. Nothing was enough.
We were adrift in a cycle of chaos—therapy, treatments, and residential programs miles from home—none bringing the solace or solution we desperately sought.
None of the many experts would or could diagnose her correctly, so we ended up with the generic “anxiety and depression” label that so many of us get handed, but know doesn’t really fit. And the treatments didn’t fit either
Hope and Healing
Four years down this path, we have not only survived but thrived. Our once turbulent household has settled into a nurturing harbor of happiness and health.
She is now a certified Emergency Medical Technician studying for a degree in psychology (of course!).
She lives independently and MOST importantly is a loving, appreciative, respectful young woman who has good relationships and with whom it is a pleasure to spend time.
I went from being her worst enemy to becoming a close ally whom she respects and turns to in good times and in bad.
When things go sideways now, we have a set of skills that help us tolerate those times and a process to make it better for all of us.
We now have a way back from the darkness.
She is still a very sensitive young woman. That will never change. And, that is also what makes her a compassionate caregiver and a good friend. My husband and I accept and enjoy our daughter for who she truly is.
When we stopped trying to make her into who we thought she should be and learned to appreciate and find joy in who she already was, everything shifted. Towards healing. For the better. For all of us.
If I can help you with your family, fill out a Discovery Session Form and let’s talk.
Click here to find a better way forward with your loved one
HOW I CAN HELP YOU
How my Mentorship works
I work exclusively with parents and loved ones of those struggling with emotional dysregulation and/or Borderline Personality Disorder.
My Mentorship is designed to meet you where you are emotionally and relationship-wise.
Private, one-on-one coaching is done from the convenience of your home, workplace, car or café. We meet over video or audio-conferencing at a time that works for you.
Our sessions will include learning proven, evidence-based thinking, communication and coping skills, as well as problem-solving specific to your situation and, of course, some “venting.” We all need that.
Customized to your situation and needs, I will provide you with additional material to support you between appointments.
Once you are in my mentorship program, if you are facing a dilemma or challenging situation between appointments, I make myself available for 15 minute “911” DBT calls.
An initial commitment of 5-10 sessions is recommended to get the maximum benefit.
Cost is $125/session
Is This Mentorship Right for you?
My mentorship program is not for everybody. If you meet one or more of the following criteria, then let’s talk:
✔ You know or suspect your loved one has emotional dysregulation or borderline personality disorder and it’s creating stress and chaos in their life and yours.
✔ Your loved one is currently in or has been in local or residential treatment for emotional dysregulation or BPD and you need more support.
✔ Your loved one currently does not accept their diagnosis and/or any treatment, but you want to help them and yourself anyway.
✔ You’ve learned some DBT skills, but are having difficulty applying the skills in real life.
✔ You haven’t yet learned DBT skills, but feel they would help you and/or your loved one.
✔ You are not currently in therapy, but want to learn how to better cope and communicate with your loved one.
✔ You are currently in therapy and want the additional support of a skills coach
My approach is based on no shame and no blame. You are doing the best you can under very difficult circumstances. There are just some things you don’t know yet.
Which is where I come in.
Click here to find a better way forward with your loved one